Isaac and I went to Winger's for lunch the other day. It's the first time I've ever been there (and, really, I don't see us going very often from here on out!). What made this outing memorable, however, was the fact we DID try to eat there once before. The first year we were married. I couldn't remember all the details of that first outing, but Isaac reminded me. We had sat down, looked at the prices and immediately left, finding somewhere more affordable to go that day.
We talked about this as we sat for lunch. I chuckled when I looked at the prices. They weren't particularly scary, but perspective is a funny thing. I think I sometimes forget how very, very poor we were, first married. I think that's one of the weirdest things, moving back here. The stark juxtaposition between THEN and NOW. And, oh. It is stark.
I'm becoming one of those that is starting to forget how we struggled. How MUCH we struggled. How in debt I was when we married. I'm becoming one of those that is starting to forget a lot and I hate it. I think remembering is good. Remembering keeps us grounded and empathetic. I don't want to lose that. Even if I don't go back to Winger's again...
(somebody that i used to know, gotye)
This is a great post. It's all about perspective, isn't it? No matter what comes our way, I want our kids to be grateful and frugal.
ReplyDeleteWell, that and Winger's is gross.
ReplyDeleteIt really wasn't the best...
DeleteI have vivid memories of my parents' poverty and frugality during the early years of their marriage. (They were poor and frugal for a lot of years.) My husband and I got to a comfortable place financially much sooner in our marriage than my parents did in theirs. (In fact, I'm not sure they were ever comfortable, regardless of how much money they made.) I still have a reasonably frugal mindset. Not that I don't spend more than I think I ought to. But when I spend what I consider a large amount of money (>$50), I feel guilty, I second-guess myself, I assume there's frivolity there I can't really afford (even though I can, and even when there isn't). I think it goes back to me absorbing my parents' insecurity. My children have no sense of financial insecurity. Which one might think is a good thing, but I worry that they don't understand the value of money. I also worry that they're growing accustomed to a lifestyle they won't be able to afford when they're on their own. When I left home, I understood about living on the cheap. I don't think my children understand that at all.
ReplyDeleteI was going to reply, but I think I want to do a longer blog post, instead. You bring up things I think about A LOT.
DeleteI have the same worries, and then one of my kids says, "Twenty dollars?? What a rip!" and I think maybe I haven't completely ruined them. Yet.
DeleteHa! Sammy's taken a frugal turn lately. I find it cute (and encouraging) until he says, in a very put upon voice in the middle of the store, "I don't want you to waste your money on me for that!"...Sigh.
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