This Week In Pictures

Sunday night:


Our new print above our couch:


Such a cutie:


Hanging with my boy:


Valentine's Day:


Fun with photo booth:



(howard jones - pearl in the shell)

*I* May Not Have Food Issues, But *HE* Certainly Does...

Sammy is PICK-Y. And it may be killing me. Sure, he'll eat. Oatmeal, yogurt, uh...sandwiches? But heaven forbid he tries anything new. Wait. Picky isn't the right word, I don't think. Because he WILL eat. And the list isn't as short as it used to be. But trying anything new is still killer.

We have one rule about food. That is all. You have to TRY some of everything and then we go from there. Beyond that, we've tried it all to get this kid to eat. Time out. Threats. Pleading. Going to bed "hungry" (like my kid is ever hungry! That tactic only works on kids who aren't stubborn ninjas that don't need food...). Whatever. But I'm starting to lose it, now. I can't tell if his 'finickiness' is getting worse or I'm just getting more tired.

I read an article last weekend and immediately forwarded it to Isaac. It gave me a little hope, describing that the pickiest time in a kids life starts lifting around age 6. What?! There's hope?! Praise! And went on to detail how NOT to go about the food issue. You know...basically everything we've ever tried. So we're backing off. Our one rule still stands, but I just know that I'm refusing to battle, now and I don't know if that is the right call, but it's all I have. Because stubborn? You have no idea. My kid can out stubborn anyone. And food is not where I want to draw that line in the sand.

Please tell me I'm not the only one with this problem. I'm looking for sympathy, here, people! We both LOVE food. All kinds. But Sammy is about to do us in, out of frustration over this. Simple eating shouldn't be this HARD, I swear! Though, I suspect it's my fault. I *DID* swear I would never have a picky eater for a kid, as I watched others I know struggle. Can you effectively call off karma, once you learned your lesson?

**on a happy note, he finally eats eggs and actually had a plate of homemade toast and gravy the other night...oh, how life has opened up a little!


(bell x1 - the great defector)

Top 5 I'm Over It

Songs that I used to love (or like) but if I never heard them again, that would be divine. So we aren't talking songs I've always hated (your Celines, Mariahs, et al), but stuff I did love or should love but have just grown very, very weary of.

1. You Spin Me Round - Dead or Alive: I know. But man I'm tired of it.


2. Animal - Neon Trees: Forgive me. I feel I've sinned and that the mom of one of them that I'm friends with (how's that for sentence construction...ha!) will hear my clicking fingers as I type!


3. Love Shack - the B-52s: It's over. Seriously.


4. Strangelove - Depeche Mode: Lets call it unpleasant high school modern dance flashbacks and leave it?


5. Are You Gonna Be My Girl - Jet: I think this one defines this list. I tired several years ago and it's still not regained any glory with me.

Love Really Is All Around

Can I tell you a secret? I don't really hate Valentine's Day anymore. I know! Who knew? I mean, I'm still not demanding the pomp and circumstance (though I bought my own roses yesterday), but I'm not hating it, either.

We're not going out to eat and no presents will be exchanged, but my thinking has shifted. This is now very much a family affair, in our house. A special dinner, at home, with my boys. Celebrating us. It's fun to see Sammy so into the day, a boy full of love you've never before seen, and it's a little contagious. I'm excited to see his valentines and hear about his party. I'm anxious to grill pork chops and make a salad and sit down. Content. Watch some tv with my love and snuggle in.

Yes, it's probably still a made up stupid holiday, but I don't care. I love the love. And I'm ok with that. Now.


(angel at my table - glen hansard)

What Am I?

I've been taking a body / self esteem class on-line. I signed up on a whim, thinking it would be good for me. One step toward...something. Banishing the fear. I figured, why not, right? I'm all about fearing less this year and we all know that all women fear their bodies (um...) so, I signed up. And then I learned something about myself.

I don't have body issues. I mean, I don't love the extra weight and I sometimes wish I was stunning in the world's eyes, but I'm cute and sexy and my husband makes me feel beautiful and and and. I'm good. Except freckles. Those I hate. So I have a "freckle issue". I also don't have food issues. I love food and don't diet - have never "dieted", only generally tried to eat well and leave it at that. I don't comfort eat. I don't emotionally eat. I don't self loathe eat. I eat to eat. Period. Huh. Who knew?

I'm surprised for two simple reasons. We are taught to believe that all women are a certain way. We hear it over and over and over again and then we start to believe it. I'm not knocking food or body issues. I know they are real. I have friends and family who struggle, to varying degrees, with either or both. And I have tried to "fit in" on a number of occasions. But the truth is, I don't have this particular struggle. The second reason is that I very much SHOULD have a problem. I can recount time and again where things happened that definitely impacted the way I look at myself. A dance when I was 15 where the boy I liked made fun of my lovely yellow dress I was wearing, instead of wearing something more casual. My former best friend telling me my legs didn't measure up to his fantasy woman. Wearing hand me downs and "not quite perfect" clothes all through school. Wearing glasses LONG before the hipster uprising. But for every one of those, I have other stories. Better stories. That not only cancel the others out, but replaces them.

What I do have, though, is a fear of getting sick. I have a skewed way of thinking about my health. Part of having fibro is constant wondering if what I'm feeling is just...fibro or if it's something else. And due to my personality, my inability to trust and listen, I go to the worst case. Every time. And that isn't right. And while it's not body issues or food issues, it's a soul issue. And I'm beginning to wonder if that's a tougher fight to fight.


(gotye, somebody that i used to know)