Saturday - I got stopped no less than three times at the farmer's market over these shoes. I do love them. Oh, yes I do.
Sunday - Speaking of love...
Monday - Sammy in the 'yard'. Toys, dirt box and mud puddles. And Sammy's impression of an orange caution cone!
Tuesday - Best snack ever. Even if I cut ALL processed foods from my life, I will be hard pressed to cut these. Because they rule. Crappy picture and all.
It would appear I'm writing again. I took a longer than planned hiatus (um...about 8 months longer!), trying to work some crazy out, but I feel renewed and once again focused. And it's an amazing feeling. After my last (because, lo, there were many!) declaration of "I'm never writing again!", I actually sat with it. And didn't write. Just to feel what would happen. And the first two months were freeing. I really thought I had stumbled onto the key to my happiness - eschewing who I thought I was and never looking back. But then month three rolled around. Ah, month three. Even though I could feel the stirrings in my soul, I ignored. I wasn't ready to deal with them yet. But lately, the pull was too strong. And I sat. And felt. And thought. And had incredible, spiritual, experiences that told me I wasn't done. To deny my moniker of 'writer' would be to deny my soul. And I simply cannot do that. For whatever reason and in whatever medium, I was born to write. I know that as I know anything, now.
This knowledge has me renewed, for the moment. I'm uncovering things about this gift I had never thought of before. I'm exploring avenues I had closed. I'm letting go of demons, internal and otherwise. I'm clearing my mind and focusing on what I know. What I am. What I should be doing. And I'm suddenly hungry. Hungry like I've never been before. I attribute a lot of this to Sammy's last year at home. I needed the time with him. But I also know that in seven weeks, he'll be off, carving out his own adventures, and the thought of losing him reminded me that I could find myself, again. And that is what I needed. A spur to awake from a five year fog. I am more than the sum of my child and that is truly ok. I am not a "writer (but only when I wasn't a mom)". I am a writer. Without the parenthetical.
I know I've said this before, so many times, right here! - but now. Now it is beyond a simple self pep talk. It's a fire call to action. I've tried the pep talks. I've tried the abandoning. I've tried the 'say it and simply believe it'. Now is the time for action and if I abandon this fire, I will have no one but myself to blame. I will be denying my soul and the truth of my life and I would fully expect my gift to be taken. And if that happens, I will only be able to nod in sad agreement; it will be on me.
So I've started. I've let Isaac read a couple of starts. Which is huge for me. I've set up another blog, oh...long ago, for the express purpose of sharing a few stories. I'll link to them from time to time. Read if you like or no, but I need to get a few things out for public consumption. It is the right thing to do. This is going to be a crazy ride, but I'm no longer hearing those nay-saying voices in my head. A voice - a call - to do is much louder. Finally.
Up about 1/2 hour earlier. Neither of us slept well. Hot/cold/hot/cold/dreams of crickets. Sigh...
Woke up to this. Babbling on and on about something on the iPad. I never did understand it all. I blame me not listening to him.
A quick haircut for Isaac (I'll spare you the during photos since neither of us were dressed) and breakfast for Sammy. Complete with Scooby Doo.
Checking on park progress from our bedroom window. We're hoping it's done before Sammy's birthday because park in our backyard TOTALLY trumps park we have to drive to...
Dressed for the day. Superman is needed to get through a 90* day.
At the park for .2 seconds, due to the heat.
And then off to drop a package off to Isaac, get sno cones, a new book and lunch. (best.breadsticks.ever.)
Hanging out at the doctor's, waiting for Aunt Sharon.
Sonic happy hour. Come to me, my lemon berry slush!
Snack time. With Zula Patrol. Don't ask.
Dinner at our favorite restaurant. With the BEST waitress in the world!
To finish off the day, decisions...episodes of Justified or reading? Justified won.
It's nearly July. The summer is nearing half over (which is WRONG considering we've only had one true week of it so far!) and I'm finding I still have so much I want to do. So I've decided to make a list. Whether or not we do all of it (doubtful!) isn't the point. It's just good to get it all down and then we can sift through as a family and focus on what is important enough to us to actually do. So...in no particular order...
Tawnya Family Summer o' Fun:
-Spend the day in Jackson Hole -Campus ice cream / games on the quad -Brace my soul for a trip to Utah county for sandwiches -Salt Flats or Antelope Island -Day in Bear Lake -School shopping in Park City / SLC -Overnight trip for our anniversary -Def Leppard with friends -Our town's annual Main Street sidewalk sale, complete with stopping for lunch -Picnic and feed the ducks -Water balloons (Sammy's birthday party?) -Dinner on the patio at any of our favorite restaurants -Research weekend in Moab. Or St. George. But probably Moab. -Convince Sammy that riding a bike is fun -Curl up on the bed, a/c blasting, under a blanket and READ. Also, with Sammy. So he'll stop saying it's "boring" because that? Nearly kills me. -Fireworks! My favorite! -Invite friends for picnic / games for family night -Walk to get ice cream for dinner -Indulge in sno cones at every opportunity -Movie outside - either at a drive in or park or rent a projector -Convince Isaac I need a Jeep (ok, just kidding. Sort of...) -Schedule family pictures -New school friend play date -David Gray concert -Paint bedrooms -Dinosaur park / zoo / SLC groupon passes -Find screen door. And porch rockers. -S'mores. Which require a fire pit... -Read on the porch at night with lemonade -Isaac's family party
Already done: -Family vacation -Summerfest -BBQ with friends -U2 concert
Last Thursday I hosted pie night. It was lovely. Mostly. Well, the pie was good.
We ended up with a quiche (which was DIVINE for breakfast the next day), a caramel apple cheese pie, a butterscotch pudding pie, a cherry chocolate pie, a balsamic strawberry pie, a blueberry lime cream pie, a berry pie and a cherry / apple pie. I taught everyone how to make crust and we all did a different filling and then we ate. And had lots of pie to take home to the families.
Here's what I recommend for a pie night: lots of friends, lots of flour and butter, lots of laughs and milk and Trader Joe's lemonade. Here's what I don't recommend: picking a fight with your husband while your house is full of guests. You know, it's not fun...ESPECIALLY about something stupid. See, our a/c wasn't working. It was hot. We were baking. There were a lot of bodies in my kitchen. I get grouchy when I'm hot and pick fights that don't need to be issues. It really was the perfect storm.
Last summer was our a/c's first summer to function. And it had to be serviced about four times. FINALLY we thought our a/c guy fixed the issue, we went into winter and didn't think about it. Until we turned it on for the first time Thursday, about an hour before everyone came over. And the fan worked, but the cold air was missing. Isaac wanted to fire our a/c guy, I wanted the moon. I got upset and yelled (with company downstairs) and then yelled some more. It wasn't pretty. It was hot. It (and I) finally cooled off enough to open windows and the evening was fine. Except when I thought I had hurt the feelings of one of my dearest friends. That happened nearly concurrently with the yelling and I wanted to run away. Clearly I need tips on how to play well with others.
But we ate. It was delicious. People had a good time. Camille may never come to anything with my friends again. I didn't offend my friend and we talked and cried and she made me hug. Friday our a/c guy came, fixed the wire that needed to be fixed. Cold air reigned forth and he didn't charge us. We remembered why we liked him and he saved his bacon where we are concerned. Although after six and a half hours in the yard and mild heat stroke, I would have forgiven him nearly anything so long as that cold air was flowing.
And. Well. You know. The leftover pie was really good. May I suggest you make this? Just smear a layer of cherries in the bottom before you bake the crust. You'll thank me.
